Destinations

 

Wednesday, April 11, 2018

Solace

This blog has been eerily quiet for quite some time. Part of that is due to the two posts that sit waiting to be completed from our travels in 2017 in the midst of this busy season of life. But a bigger part of that is due to our last vacation having been back in mid-June of last year, and there being nothing planned on the horizon. For someone who loves to travel, the silence is deafening.

If you haven't been following along with our family blog (http://markandamyjohnson.blogspot.com), Mark was recently diagnosed after a very long 8 months of searching for answers with Behavioral Variant Frontotemporal Dementia. In very great summary, this means he has between 2-10 years left to live. To LIVE. But he's already at such a diminished capacity to live that he will not travel again most likely.

I am completely exhausted after so much time searching for these answers, and also from the emotional blow of the reality of it all, and well...I desperately need a break from life right now. I very recently booked a 3 night getaway just for myself, and I'm so giddily excited about it! So...stay tuned for more details as I go along. Part of me wants to bundle it all up for myself and tell no one, and the other part of me wants to shout it from the mountaintops.

I just need a little solace. This will be the first vacation I have planned that I do not intend to do any real scheduling or advance planning. I don't want to book excursions or buy tickets to museums or gardens or anything like that. I just want to sit and relax and enjoy some peace and quiet, and I have been assured that the place I am going will be perfect for that.

I'm a little nervous, if I'm being honest. Not because traveling alone scares me: I've done a fair amount of it, really. But because I've never been so selfish in my life. I spent a LOT of money, and I'm going somewhere on my bucket list, and I'm leaving EVERYTHING behind for this trip. It feels indulgent. But I think after everything I've been through the past two years, I need a little indulgence. The Lord has led me to this place, and I'm excited to spend some time alone with him in this place.